A Space in Time


I found the space I needed, 

though I didn’t know it at the time.

A space to clear my thoughts away, 

a space to give me time.

I didn’t know I was searching, 

it quite took me by surprise.

I thought I needed people near, 

such space I’d never tried.

But I’m finding myself in openness, 

time is mending my heart.

I know that life will wait for me, 

be waiting when I start.

I’ve found a little space in time, 

a safe space for recovery.

I now know that I’ve needed this, 

just took me a while to see.

I thought this place would be boring,

that people I’d need to find.

But I’ve found a piece of heaven here, 

it’s so gentle on my mind.

~


lizalizaskysaregrey©2017

Owning the Story

I don’t believe in living in the past but believe it incredibly important to make some sense of it in order to understand ourselves today. If we don’t know where we come from, how will we ever know where we are going.

The past is important in that it has shaped us into the people we are today. Our lives are dictated in a way by our experiences, good and bad, and if we don’t understand them then it is difficult to fully understand ourselves.

Many of us recreate events unconsciously because we don’t understand them. I married my father, or somebody very similar because my father walked out on us when I was a very young child. I know it’s quite common that we might marry someone very similar to our own parents, familiarity maybe but it’s good to understand why. When we understand where we come from it’s less likely that we will keep repeating the same mistakes.

I spent a period of time not believing in myself as my experience told me I wasn’t worth believing in, I had a terrible time with rejection of any sort. I still don’t like it much but I know now, I’m okay. I won’t continually be judged because of who I was, but who I am today. I spent a long time gathering possessions that might up my status somehow, I didn’t come from a wealthy home and believed I needed possession to speak for me. Only on thinking about where I come from and getting to know myself better am I able to let some of these things go.

Life story work is a process that’s often undertaken with children in care so they are able to recognise their past, understand the present and plan for the future. It’s also a routine part of preparing children for adoption. Life story work is often used with those suffering dementia to develop a biography and help those caring for them communicate their backgrounds, like interests, identity and who and what is important to them. It’s hugely beneficial in helping someone understand their past experiences and life events.

Our life stories are so important, we need to understand and own our stories. Some of us do better than others, writers for might as they find inspiration from their own experiences. I’m sure there are plenty of other examples such as therapists who have had to undergo therapy as part of their training. But I find it amazing how many people don’t understand their own stories.

I’ve worked with life stories during my career with children, I’ve also worked on my own life story and helped others with this too. I think life story work is beneficial to anyone wanting a better understanding of themselves, it’s healing and can remove the blocks that hold us back. It’s more than just a therapeutic tool, it’s helpful to anyone working on themselves, and lets be honest aren’t we all?

~

lizalizaskysaregrey©2017

Healing Power of Nature

Nature, it’s beauty and colours heal the spirit without a doubt, it just takes trust and belief.  I believe if we trust and immerse ourselves in the colours of nature we will feel it’s healing energy.  Just to know that we are connected to nature as we are to all things, allows us to heal from the inside out. 

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I have spent a good deal of time in nature this year, it has taught me a lot about myself and I have emerged a different person.  The simplicity and depth of nature amazes me, the patterns, the cycles reminds me that all things in life come and go, nothing is forever and everything returns. I can feel the healing power of nature, I believe it and it tells me that all will come well, the I that I think I am is just part of this beautiful landscape, I am connected to all nature, I just have to see that connection and let it become part of who I am.

lizalizaskysaregrey©2017

Healing through Writing

I write to work out my world, I find writing therapeutic in that it helps me look back at experience and gain an understanding, maybe a different perspective of events.  I find to write about painful memories helps ease the pain, it helps me understand and make sense of those memories so I can let them go or at least turn them into something more manageable.

Often when we look back at difficult events we do so in quick flashes, leaving the scene as soon as it becomes unbearable.  It’s then buried again among the pain of our very foundations, the foundations that we work from, those that direct everything we do.  If we don’t come to terms with the difficult episodes they become the foundations for our future.  We will base our future decisions on past experiences and we won’t grow.

Our experiences, good and bad are the things that help us grow, however difficult our experiences, they should be meaningful if we are to grow from them.  I find it just as helpful to write about happiness, it brings those feeling back home.

I find when I revisit something I can see it in a different way, I’m good at visualisation so I put myself in the scene and look around, sometimes I might see another way out, not that it helps the past but it can certainly help the future.

Rumour has it when we die our life passes in front of us, we learn about our lives from what we see.  Why not do it now when we have opportunity to make those changes.  Sometimes by going back, we can reframe our experiences and rewrite our futures.

lizalizaskysaregrey©2016

Muddled Emotions

 

I hate it your so angry,

well that’s what you think it is.

you’re struggling to cope right now,

and really in a tis.

As I watch you wound up like a ball,

just about to burst,

You don’t know how to manage it,

and coping with the worst.

I wish that you could understand,

what is really going on,

your thinking that it’s anger,

I’m sorry but you are wrong.

What I see in you is absolute pain,

with a sadness deep inside,

but you can’t acknowledge it,

this might be your pride.

If you could recognise the feeling,

bring it up and say hello,

it might start the healing process,

and might help the emotion go.

But while you stay in angry mode,

with walls built high around.

It’s hard for me to help you see,

it’s sadness that we’ve found.