I’m as Focused as I’ll Ever Be..

I’m as focused as I’ll ever be,

but that not much you see.

I’d rather be wondering slowly,

than to move fast from A to B.

I’m not a fan of planning,

I’d rather just do as I please.

To be focused you need to focus,

and it doesn’t appeal to me.

I can concentrate a little,

on the things that I like to do.

Like creating something special,

I might even give it to you.

Focus isn’t a word I like,

it reminds me too much of school.

As if I look to far in front,

I might miss this moments jewel.





It’s hard to stay focused without eyes!

My trip to the crypt today in Hythe, Kent.

Good set of teeth to last a few hundred years!


I thought the crypt quite fascinating and just down the road too. I’ve visited bone chapels in Europe but was surprised to find these down the road from my flat. All the sculls are pre 1800’s, there are thigh bones too!


A birds nest!


Top of the head missing

Well maybe there’s more to the town than I originally thought! ūüėČ



We go to war over values,

if they’re wrong or right.

It’s often values that drive us,

they can lead us into a fight.

Values are simply judgements,

that what we love and hate.

We might say we’ll die for it,

such a huge mistake to make.

It might be what we strive for,

or what we feel we must leave.

Neither of these are certain,

simply they’re what we believe.

Values are contextual see,

it can depend who we are.

We might have values one day,

on another they are quite far.

We’ve all got a set of values,

based purely on what we think.

It’s a shock that changes values,

and that might occur in a blink.




How do we Care?

I can’t stand all the pain in the world right now, the terror and hopelessness, the atrocities happening each and every moment and the suffering. I can’t stand to watch it on the news, but I do. I read the reports on the internet and listen to speeches, I empathise, or do I?

This is what I hate, I hate the fact that I can watch something, see the crying faces of children, see starvation and fear and yet turn the TV off and think about what I’m having for dinner. How can I think about what I’m having for dinner when so many people don’t have dinner, don’t even have the water they need to survive. I look at my bed and think the sheets need changing, the sheets need changing on my big comfortable and stylish bed. And you know what I iron those bloody sheets too because it wouldn’t be good enough to put them on the bed un-ironed!

What is wrong with me, is my brain not working as it should, when I see horror, why does it not stay, why does it not hold me and prevent me from enjoying life. Why does it not bring into perspective how bloody rich I am and why on earth do I still think I need more than I have right now?

I’ve asked around about, it seems others are the same, maybe our brains are not wired to take in the suffering of others if we are not involved or it does not affect anyone we care about. Am I right, I’d be interested in your thoughts because I’m not feeling that good about myself?

I wonder if this is how we protect ourselves, is it our conscious mind telling us it’s nothing to do with us. Don’t get me wrong, I do what I can to help, I donate, I share a message and I discuss what’s going on in the world, I show I care what’s happening to others and I pray too.

What more can I do, it’s not feasible for me to get on a plane and fly out and help. I would probably be of no use, I’m too old, too inexperienced and I’d probably be useless anyway.

That’s it I feel useless, I feel helpless and I feel awful about my feelings when I should be feeling awful for others. I wish that wishes worked, I wish I could make it all better, I wish I could heal the world, but I can’t and I will have to put up with my feelings for now and hope and pray for a better and more loving world.



Wired to the Universe

I’m wired up to the universe,

with a strong invisible thread.

To hold me while I need it,  

I’m as sure when I’m dead.

Linking me to every moment,

as I’m paying a visit just now.

I came down from the stars,

but I cannot remember how.

I’m connected to all there is,

Spreading all over the place.

I see myself in so many things,

I see too, as I look in your face.

I visit all over the milky way,

as each planet is my home.

While my body rests at night,

in my dreams I love to roam.

I grow in summer meadows,

I hang down from every tree.

As my spirit meets each part,

so I become all things I can see.

I roll in with the tides at night,

cross the mountains on a wing.

I am the grass that covers land,

I am the song the crickets sing.

Yes, my body might deteriorate,

but the thread will always last.

When I am only a pile of ashes,

I’ll be right here, not in the past.¬†





From Another Planet

Am I from another planet,

like something you’ve never seen.

Am I really that peculiar,

like a vision from your dreams.

Am I really that different,

like I just flew down from Mars.

Don’t you ever get out of here,

and drive your big flash cars.


I’m really just like everyone else,

I have a big heart like you.

You know I’m a little perturbed,

I’m at a loss of what to do.

I won’t take you in my spaceship

and I certainly won’t go.

All I ask is a little respect,

in that you just might say hello!




Looking for Inspiration

I’m finding it hard to be inspired by where I live now. I moved here a month ago, it’s pretty enough, you’ve seen some of the photos I’ve taken of the canal and beach but it doesn’t speak to me. I’m okay, I’m plodding along doing my thing but I’m not struck by inspiration in the slightest.

It’s the energy of the place I think, it’s slow and if I’m honest a little dull. It’s temporary, always was in that I’m not staying long, but it’s certainly not me. Now for the positives, it’s slowed me down, got me more in touch with myself. I spend long periods alone and I’m benefiting from them. I’ve lost an amazing 4lb’s in weight as I’m not socialising which is a big plus if ever there was one. I’ve started a course and I’m loving it, it’s got me to pull out some old books and I’ve lots of new stuff to learn, I have the time too without distractions.

Energy is a funny thing, I think it’s affected by so many things. The people here seem very insular, I walk down the canal saying hello or smiling at people I pass, the number of them who look at me as if I’m mad or pretend they didn’t hear me is weird. ¬†They look at me like I’m crazy, like I’m from another planet, but it’s not me it’s them. On the other hand I do talk to a lot of dogs, dogs aren’t fussy. The High Street is boring, there is nothing that calls me. Yes there’s a post office, bank and chemist but there isn’t anything that interests me. It’s old and I suppose quaint and the folk around here are pretty proud of it, it has a number of visitors but there is nothing that calls me. Is it the people or the energy of the town, I don’t know but I’m not keen.

I’m spoilt I suppose, fifteen years living in Brighton with all it’s vibrancy and style. I was brought up in London and I’m pretty well travelled, yes I’m spoilt and if I’m honest a little fussy. As you know I love nature and I can certainly appreciate the beauty of my surroundings but there’s something missing that I just can’t put my finger on.

I’ll ponder a while on it and carry on spending time on me, pamper myself maybe ūüėČ



At the End of the Day


I love to watch this family of swans. Mum has had seven babies this year but they are growing fast, as big as their parents. ¬†I followed them home down the canal last night and I think got some lovely shots. I love the fact that they have days out, heading off down the canal and into town where I’m sure they know they’ll get fed and back home to their nest at the end of the day.






The World Ends Again

So the world is ending again on Saturday, well it’s the rapture anyway so they say. Some of us will be lifted to heaven in the ascension and the rest left here on earth to perish.

I’m a follower of the world ending, I mentally prepare and make sure I’ve told everyone I love them every time. My son laughs and says ‘not again’, I laugh too as I know it’s a lot of rubbish but there’s always that ridiculous little doubt inside of me that says what if?

Being of rational mind, I’m not really falling for it. I don’t believe it will end in this way, not this Saturday anyway. Will the world ever really end, civilisation maybe, but I feel if there is an ending, Mother Nature will survive, she may rest a while, heal herself and recharge her energy but then she will grow up again to be as beautiful as she has ever been.

Sometimes I think we might be close, icecaps are melting and the weather is certainly stepping up a gear, we have lunatics as leaders and everyday egos are huge. But there is balance, in as much as there is a lot of shit in the world, there is also a lot of goodness, love seems to have made a revival. Science and spirituality are meeting on more even ground and talking to each other, connecting concepts and making links between what were once totally unrelated fields. It seems that science and spirituality really can fit on the same page.

Here’s the thing, if it was true that the world would end on a certain day in time, then there would be no point in getting things right, purpose would have no meaning. I can believe the world might end if we don’t make some drastic changes to how we look after it, but I don’t think that it will. We have choices, we go up the wrong path or the right one and if the world was always going to end there would only ever have been one path.

Our purpose or task here is to see where we fit into the world, not as individuals but as a collective force that can make a difference to everything there is and therefore everyone around us.

As for Saturday, I’ll be on my course sitting in a classroom absorbing what I’m being taught, I’ll need it for my future. I might leave the ironing until Sunday or maybe later but that’s just because I hate ironing!