From the Heart
~
My trajectory is meaningful,
I’m projected out with force.
In following my pathway,
it can be hard to stay on course.
I think I know the destination,
until a rocket sends me off.
Holding on to my foundations,
and fighting hard to stay aloft.
But so it goes with pathways,
it’s the curves that cause a spin.
In order to remain on track,
we have to search within.
~
I question that I come to bare the fruits from that same tree.
Of all the mystery that unfolds, I cannot plainly see.
Why eternities not clearly signed and I still have to find my way.
You went before me up ahead, yet I’m still as blind today.
Reach out your kindness, walk by my side and help me as I go.
So I might set example here, in the love that I will sow.
We plant a seed in faith and trust, we pray for sun and rain.
But once it’s sown, the deed is done we cannot plant again.
Like the blooms we have to trust, the heavens will provide.
That we receive the things we need in order to survive.
I came across this piece of graffiti while walking in Brighton today and was quite taken with what it said to me. I took a photo of it and thought I would try a sort of psychic reading.
The art was half way up a staircase. The stairs are a thoroughfare from one road, up a hill to a parallel road above. You have to be local to know they are there, they are hidden from view. This suggested to me that the artist, was neither here or there, but on his way up.
I feel this was painted by a young man who is still discovering himself. The face he shows to the world different to the soul beneath, he wears a mask. He presents a tough exterior, doesn’t smile an awful lot, if at all to those who don’t know him. He is still finding himself, he is in the process of carving out his identity. I believe he is on his way up and getting closer to his destination. I think this is a self portrait, even if he was unaware of this at the time.
He wants us to think that he meets the world head on, he knows where he is going but I believe he is still tortured by the past. Torture might not be the right word here, but he shows a sadness, the sadness that comes from past experiences that leave scars on the soul. I get this from the eye on the left, right in the photo, that appears to be focussed on the past.
That he chose a secluded spot to display his art, made me feel he was waiting to be noticed and at the same time, desperately wants to be worthy of being noticed. He is not ready to show his true self yet, he doesn’t believe he will be accepted. But there is hope in the art work and I think hope for the future.
I believe he comes from love, there are people around him that love him although he might not be aware of this at the present time. I see two circles behind him in blue and green, signifying love and healing. I’m not sure he consciously painted them but to me they are his people.
I feel this young man is a thinker and communicator, he has the ability to communicate his understanding of the world but at present he is quiet. He has passion, this will develop as he begins to understand himself and his place in the world. Above all I see a gentleness that will grow and flourish.
This gives me hope.
There are many boats on the ocean. Some of these are small boats, big enough for one fisherman and then there are the larger vessels, such as ocean liners carrying hundreds of passengers. All are at the control of the tides and the stars and the crossing is not guaranteed.
Some of these boats will last an age, they are the friends of the ocean, built well to work with the water and blow with the wind. The Ocean is in control and the vessels sail and reach their destination with its permission alone. There is not a boat that can control the water, the ocean is the constant thing, the boats come and go.
The ocean’s soul is made up of many who have crossed it. The souls that live in the ocean, those that work with the ocean or encounter it, add their experience to its great depth and vastness.
I think the ocean is a lot like life, we get through it with luck and permission, not by trying to control it.
It doesn’t really matter what branch we are on because at the very end of each branch the sun rises and the moon sets.
She walked down the cobbled pathway towards toward her childhood home, she hadn’t been back in years and yet it looked just the same. The shiny cobbles the rain had washed and shined for her arrival, the blossom floating between the cobbles, knocked from the tree in the shower sparked memories of days gone by. A rainbow appeared to arch the ally down the hill to the small house where she had been brought up. Didn’t that signify a pot of gold, she certainly hoped so.
She was looking for herself, she was in search of what was constant inside of her, what was true. She had changed so much since she left the village, travelled the world and met so many people she felt that she had been moulded into something else completely. She wanted to find her essence in all the confusion of life and had felt a pull to return to where it began if she were ever to find the truth.
She wanted to find what was real, not just thought, fear or judgement but real and constant. She knew she had to come back to the village, experience the peace of the place and still her mind. She took a deep breath and slowly let it leave her body as she took a step closer to the house at the end of the lane.
Her therapist had asked her what in her life was constant and she hadn’t been able to answer. She thought it was something about who she really was and might be discovered in returning to where she had come from at the very beginning of her life. The place she had felt safe in, the place in which she had been allowed to be her natural and authentic self.
Now she knew she had to let go of yesterday and the city, let all the thoughts go past. Accept and let them pass, she did’t want to dwell on them, she didn’t want to loose track of why she was here. She looked down at her feet, connecting to the earth and step by step moved closer to home.
The gate still hung from the rickety post, she lifted the latch and pushed it open stepping onto the path. Flowers framed the pathway to the front door, smiling up at her as she passed them, welcoming her home. The door was still green, a slightly deeper shade but green non the less. She put her hand on the brass handle, feeling the warmth of the metal in her palm. She took another deep breath, opened the door and stepped through.
She was in the parlour, it was exactly how she had remembered although she didn’t want to think she wanted to still her mind. The same old comfy chair was in the middle of the room and she stepped towards it and sat, hands open on her lap. Her mind was still and her heart was open as she sat there waiting, watching and listening. She saw herself sitting, she watched as thoughts passed by in trickles, she let them go, detaching herself from anything outside of herself. For the first time in a long time she felt at one with herself, she wasn’t watching herself anymore she was connected to her true self, her essence. She felt love and realised she was love, love was all there was, love was her constant. She was at one with the watcher inside, the self that accepted without judgment, she was home.
A breeze blew through her hair and she opened her eyes from her meditation and wiped the tears from her cheeks. She uncrossed her legs and stretched up with her arms, it was always good to go home and get away from the city.
Every one is looking for a someone to point them in the right direction, right? We all know there is something more out there or something deep inside of each of us, available but just out of our grasp. If only we could find the way, become enlightened, awaken, reach nirvana, perfect ourselves and win the ultimate prize.
Spirituality is a big and booming industry, with new pathways created daily by gurus who promise big answers. Each and every one of these, has the right answer and at a cost but what is money when enlightenment awaits?
Why the search, why are so many of us desperately seeking the truth? Will it will make everything good in our lives, just maybe we won’t have to come back and do it all again if we get the answers right this time! Maybe we want to find a connection to those that have passed, there are probably million and one reasons, which are different for each of us. One of the main reasons for this search, I think, is fear, belief that there is something else that we are missing and fear that missing this will leave us incomplete. Fear that there isn’t really anything else and a deep hope that there is.
I think the reason these spiritual models and pathways have so many followers is because people feel they get more from the trappings of a group, ritual in community is powerful. Iconography is also important because people find it easier to believe if surrounded by icons of belief, crystals, crosses, Buddhas and the like, something to worship and hold on to.
I believe the best person out there to assist us with our pathway here is our own true authentic selves. No one else in the universe has the key to our own inner workings or understanding of our souls experience than what we have ourselves. We and only we hold this key, and this key will only turn for us. I feel we have to reach a place where we connect with pure love, where we find ourselves to be pure love, but thats only my own feeling, I am still on my journey here and have a lot still to discover.
What I do know, I’m not sure how, but I know only we, truly understand our paths here, even if forgotten for the moment or buried deep in our subconscious, I think it is our fundamental task in life to realise the purpose of our stay.
I also feel that in order to grow we need to ask questions and explore what comes up. If we have aspirations to connect with anything higher, it is essential to talk with like minded people here, have philosophical discussions and search for what feels right. Talk to spirt, talk to our higher selves and talk to the trees if they really help us find the answers. To grow here we need to find our own truth, question and build upon that truth until we meet our own understanding.
I don’t want to fit in with any particular teaching and don’t believe it’s right for me, I want to learn about them all and take from them what feels right. I suppose I could be described as eclectic in my beliefs and that feels right for now, others may feel safer connected with a group. I don’t think any of us have the answers, the puzzle would be solved if we did, and therefore the purpose of our stay here met.
Faith should be redefined, faith is moving, living and acting to what we know to be true, allowing for change and being open to new ideas. Seek inwardly, though meditation, through connection with nature, through whatever assists. Seek outwardly, keep our eyes open, listen and open up to fresh ideas.
I believe we are all spirit, all souls and have always been this way. We live here now in our earthly bodies but we can, if we look find our true selves. We could start by looking at ourselves, looking in the mirror, looking deep into our own eyes and beyond and asking ourselves if we are acting as best we can, surely thats the purpose. Do we act on a daily basis as the spiritual people we want to be, do we follow our own calling.
Lastly live the fullness of life that we can on earth and enjoy the journey, while watching and waiting, but not by being to busy searching for the destination that we miss the beautiful moments of each day.
We spend a lot of time trying to discover who we really are, find out what we should be doing and how to live our lives. We attempt to connect with our true selves, through meditation, mindfulness and just regular kindness. We treat our bodies well and love as we should, unconditionally when we can. We are kind to the planet and follow as best we can the recommended spiritual pathways. Thousands of books have been written on the subject of spirituality, from many different points of view, but who are we really?
I believe we are spirit incarnated in a physical body, living regular lives on this planet called earth and that is the problem. A spiritual being is made up of energy and colour but without form, spirit is thought, love and feeling not matter. When we are born into this earthly existence wherever we came from and whatever we knew before, the first primitive things that hit us are the needs of our physical body. We need warmth, food, clothing and shelter and there it begins our departure from anything we were connected with before. We have to find our way through a world based on materialism, where what you own counts more than what you do. We are programmed from the moment of our birth into whatever society we are born into, there starts the race back.
I believe we come her with a plan, we know what our purpose is and have a hand (turn of phrase) in planning our journey. I think we even choose our families and friends in returning to the same soul groups, but play a different part each time. Not all performances get a standing ovation, but we can hope we get it right this time. We know as spiritual beings what the objectives are, in our all seeing all knowing form we understood. In retuning to the same soul groups we will influence and challenge each other, assist each others journey and hold each other back. Until we realise this journey is ours and ours alone we will not fully make progress, that is not to say that a big part of our journey might be service to others.
I think we choose our challenges but that is undertaken from a higher perspective, where we have what I call, the long view. We know what experiences we need to realise and overcome in order to grow and make progress on our spiritual pathway but we have to do it in a materialistic world full of obstacles from the moment we arrive. It does seem like a cruel trick, a difficult level in a game that we have to keep repeating until we get it right. But we do progress, I can look back on my life and see the steps I have made to get here now. I hate looking back, I’m not proud of some of my selfish and often easier choices earlier on. They say your life flashes before you when you die, there are bits of it that I see now and recognise as failure. But I hope I’m marked on my overall performance, what steps I made along the way and how much I changed. What if we get it wrong, do we have to do it all again, I’m inclined to think we do.
I believe in reincarnation, I’m not sure how it works but I believe in the continuation of the soul and reincarnation seems to me to sit nicely within it. So each life we progress until we reach a place in which we do not have to return. I’m sure there is more work to do after this but we won’t need to return again unless we chose to in order to help others. There’s a thought, say we return as a master and get it wrong, do we have to start at the very beginning. I think it can be easier to understand if you look at it like a game of snakes and ladders, each life is a new game and how quickly we get to the top depends on what we find in our way. It is so easy to land on a snake and find ourselves back where we started.
So we experience rejection, loss, poverty and illness here and have no idea why. I think that we probably have to come to a physical environment to experience these things. We are spirits learning how to be better and this is a stage in our learning, we need to overcome and find the true purpose of life in a place that doesn’t have the answers. If we think of the afterlife as a library and ourselves as students we have to agree we couldn’t sit our exams in a library, we have to find an appropriate place, an exam centre so to speak. We are all students working through the practical stage of the exam and we won’t get our results until we complete it, this might just be the foundation level.
So what about our higher selves, our greater consciousness, the part we tap into sometimes when we meditate. I’ve been told that we are connected by an invisible thread and that part of ourselves does not come to earth but remains in the spiritual planes. When we truly connect with our higher self we get the answers, because that part of us knows and can guide us in the right direction. I visualise my teenage self up there with my higher self, I think she can learn from her as could I. One problem with any form of connection is that it is we talk with our mouths, listen with our ears and work things out with our brains, spirit don’t have these things any more so we have to learn telepathy or something in order to interpret what we think we feel.
Anyway who knows, sometimes I think maybe we should just let the mystery be and find out when the race is run.
lizalizaskysaregrey 