Smoke – DP

We are all taking part in the greatest of plays.  Our reality as we know it is false, developed by the self-conscious created by each of us to mask our connection to the whole.

The self-conscious self, puts boundaries around itself to keep others out, sees itself as one, known by the name Ego.  Mr Ego puts up fences, Ego does not want to share, he lives in a world of conflict, he struggles, he is fearful of being without, he wants respect.  Ego lives in a world of smoke and mirrors.

If we get rid of Ego, knock those fences he has built down, he will see that he is in fact capable of sharing. He will realise that we all come from the same place, it was pointless to try and live separately, he will realise without these boundaries how magnificent he actually is, when Ego becomes aware of conscious he will surrender to the infinite.

The curtains close on the final performance.

via Daily Prompt: Smoke

A Question of Forgiveness?

I am told or have read that what happens to us in life is not important.   That we are to forgive those that have hurt us in the past.  Because to blame others or circumstance for our unhappiness is to be connected to the ego.  I understand this thinking, if I dare think, that to blame something or someone is to be concerned with the self, not understanding that the journey is forward and not back.  I have managed to forgive, it is not in my nature to hold a grudge, I try to find the best in people.  I recogniser others might have caused me pain but move on from this.

My question here though, is if we are to forget and forgive all that has been done to us, what should we do with the kindness and love that has been lavished upon us, is this of little consequence too?  How can we let one action go but hold onto another, is there a contradiction here or am I not understanding.

Self-consciousness is the enemy, the pretend self, the thing that binds us and prevents us from finding the true self.  Consciousness is the connection to source, without separation, a balance with nature, with the divine.  If I’m understanding, everything that is done, every action, is done to the whole, and if we are connected as I believe we are, a group experience.

I would love your thoughts on this because I want to know about love.  I promote love, I’m grateful for love and I, (although I should probably drop the ‘I’)  feel love.

 

 

Hopelessness

The full moon always affects me, I often don’t know it’s coming but I know when it’s arrived. I’m not sure why, I’ve heard we are ruled by the tides, the moon controls the tides, so it’s that simple I suppose. I also live by the sea, I’m sure you’ve heard of those that ‘live on the edge’.

I’m not usually given to moods, but this week I have a feeling of hopelessness descending that I can’t seem to kick. This really isn’t like me, I’m upbeat, don’t worry about things and know that everything comes to pass.

It makes sense when I think about it, the anniversary of my mothers death is next week. It’s been two years now and I miss her terribly. It is a wound I carry, I loved her and miss her but I am not always sad, because I remember her beauty and laughter. We used to talk everyday, I’m still talking but she’s not answering, well least not that I can hear any way. I’m missing the opportunities of being with her, those that I took for granted.

It will pass and life will go on, I will laugh and have fun. I will continue to see the beauty in the world and in others and I will love with all my heart. But and here’s the big but, it’s okay to have a bad day once in a while. It is okay to give into feelings because they are there it is okay sometimes to give into feelings of helplessness.

Not to acknowledge sadness is to repress it, and when we do that we are just freezing it out until it returns to get us as true feelings cannot be repressed forever. I used to bury a lot, anger, fear, sadness but I found it’s not helpful to me and on top of that I have to spend a fortune getting it cleared!

If I’m sad now, I acknowledge it and let it in to sit with me a while. I think about it, communicate with it and make sense of it, only then can I let it go. I believe we have to do this, it’s being present, being in the moment and working on ourselves. We can’t hide the truth, it’s better to face it, accept it and move on.

I’m in a good place in that I am able to understand what is going on, I understand how emotions can take control of us, I understand the impact of trauma and stress. I give myself therapy, lots of healing and loving care, I make sure my environment is therapeutic and put good food into my body.  I visit others for healing and energy work, supervision for my emotions I call it. I practice yoga and meditation, okay I’m a little lapse on the yoga but the intention is there. I wouldn’t be able to work helping others think through their own muddles and trauma if I couldn’t do that same work on myself.

We have to acknowledge that not everything is rosy all the time, we experience joy because we understand the opposite.  Summers are so much better after a harsh winter and the birth of a child reminds us of those we have lost.  We have to accept death, because to accept death confirms the experience of having had love in our lives.

To live in a world were everything is great all the time is just not honest. Our moods do change and life has a way of knocking us off our feet sometimes. If we keep pretending there is no problem, we will never face it, we are not living our true reality.

So my melancholy mood is okay, I’m thoughtful for the moment and want to be on my own for a while, but it will pass as everything does. Even writing this has cheered me up, writing for me is therapeutic. I hope this might help others in recognising that all things pass but if not it has helped me.

I’ll be back out there laughing and having fun in no time and I will enjoy it all the more.